Life's Like A Choo Choo Train...

How do you deal with heartache? My previous unfinished tale: "I'm not sure how else to say it. I got heartache. There are just so many things going on in my head. I'm confused about how to process this and what to say or write but I guess I'm going to do that anyway. I met a guy, whose name shall not be mentioned, at a party. I thought he was pretty cool considering he's the type of guy doesn't attract me most of the time. I guess the part of him I liked about him was that he's social and is very open minded about life in general. He made me feel comfortable and........ " Present day: I started writing about my heartache but couldn't finish due to work. So, I decided to write another journal entry. I have said this before in my blog I keep so many journal starting from paper diary to phone to here. I wish I had my diary with me but since it's not, here I am, writing yet another sob story. It began this morning. I didn't want to

I was going to nag about the day and how I was feeling sleepy (which I still am) but boy does getting coffee makes me happy!!! YEEEEEPPP!!! I'm that happy now. Just realized that talking to my friends and taking some calls for interviews made me feel lot better. I think I should make some calls after work as well. I have been feeling guilty of not doing anything  by looking at other people's progression in life compare to mine. Funny, today I read a tweet saying  "Female facebook users are more depressed and unhappy with their life than male". Let me tell you that this is so freaking true. I think the reason is that female likes to see what others have and compare with themselves. I call it insecurities. On the other hand, guys well they get insecurities too but the way they deal with it, is so amazing and calm. If a guy see his friend get an xbox, they do plan to get one too but asks lot of questions, (showing how interested they are in the product, indirectly

Why am I PMS-ing??? Everything is just so irritating, even the phone calls my dad's getting. Why do people keep calling you when the first time you don't pick up your call? I mean seriously, dude. If I don't pick up your call, it means I'm busy or not near the phone so stop calling literally after you hand up IT IT'S NOT EMERGENCY!!!!  Ugh! People piss me off. I have no idea where this anger and frustration is coming from. I need to talk to someone. I need to have that friend who can guide me and do things with me so I can calm the freak down. It's like Life itself is playing with me.  I'm so mad that every word I type I have to settle because in my mind I'm cursing so bad. This is not the person I am. What's happening? Why does life gets to frustrating? How do people handle that. I'm going crazy thinking about my financial state and my career and then studying and then not being social. It's like all the problem at the same time. But

I'm not sure if I can make it short or not since I love writing on my blog. But today is just one of those days when I'm not doing anything at work and just reading my Wattpad. So suddenly, I started thinking about my romance life and how unlucky I am. Man I'm so tired of this. I know I have commitment issue but I'm not ready to accept it as I'm trying so hard to get into relationship, find a guy who wants the same. Anyway, I think I have said it before but I can't stop and wonder how would it be like to have one night stand withoutttt any attachment or friends with benefits. I realllyyyy wish I didn't have that attachment issue right after Sex. You know right now I'm wishing that maybe I meet a playboy and be frank with him about how maybeeeee maybe he could teach me how to have better sex and give me the pleasure...  I mean playboy are famous for their experience right? What would it like to have sex with them and then NOT have attachment? Ugh! it&

I'm sitting at my desk thinking what to do. It's Friday and my manager is nowhere to be found which I don't mind at all.. It's kind of peaceful. I've been reading my Wattpad but now I have ABSOLUTELY nothing to do. I wasnt to go for a drink tonight but it seems like everyone is busy. Since it's a slow day I thought hey why not have some fun. Gosh hate this since it's been a long time I've been to any party. Ok so I guess my purpose for start writing is NOT because I want to brag about how boring my work is getting and probably my life. But I've been getting boy crazy alot!! Gosh someone just shoot me.!! I work with lots of Investment Counselor, in short we call them IC's. They are kind of the hotshot of the place I work. One of them is very attractive. They are all old and so is he. But this one kind of strikes me as Richard Gere. He has long black and gray hair. He has very genuine face and even his smile is awesome. The feature I like most

I'm at work as usual. Not working, not that I don't have work.  I opened a twitter account and started tweeting.  I'm obsessed with how many followers I have.  Yet tell myself it doesn't matter, it's your twitter account.  I have no idea what will happen if I have thousands of people following me.  I'm itching to write something on my diary and feel the roughness of the paper through my pen. I miss my ink pen.  My phone's constantly ringing from agency for employment.  I'm ignoring my calls thinking I'm at work.  Yet I feel guilty for not picking up those calls.  Then I feel sad and depressed thinking why don't I have any interviews yet.  Feeling guilty, I think about studying to refresh my memory on the subject. But I don't feel like studying or study in that matter.  Then I feel guilty and nag that I don't have enough time to study.  I feel like slapping myself for nagging and tell myself what an idiot I am